Italian Pasta Salad

This pasta salad is SO good, and totally versatile as well. You could add olives, artichokes, etc to it. I personally just added what we like to it, but you can definitely add or replace ingredients as well to make it your own! 

Salad Ingredients:
(makes a large salad)

1 lb uncooked rotini (corkscrew) 
1 package sliced pepperoni, cut into quarters 
1 package salami (I get the one from trader joes, that size was perfect for this salad), sliced and cut into quarters  
1 tomato diced
1/2 of a medium onion, very finely diced
1 (1 lb.) block mozzarella cheese, cubed
Large handful of spinach, roughly chopped

Dressing Ingredients:

1/3 cup red wine vinegar
1/2 cup olive oil
2 tablespoon sugar
1 1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
1 1/4 teaspoon dried oregano 
1 1/4 teaspoon dried basil
1/4 teaspoon italian seasoning

Directions:

Cook pasta according to the directions on the package. Rinse under cool water. 

Combine the rest of the salad ingredients in a LARGE bowl. Once pasta is cooled add it to the bowl.

In a separate small bowl combine dressing ingredients and whisk until sugar is dissolved.

Combine dressing with the salad and serve! I personally think its better the next day but it can be served immediately as well.

Store in the refrigerator.  

Becoming a Mom - the first 2 months

The first couple weeks of Lincoln's life at times were unbearably hard and so great at the same time. I knew that postpartum depression or the baby blues happening was a possibility but I just prayed it wouldn't happen. I dreamed of this for so long, and I just wanted everything to be wonderful...and it was...and it wasn't. I want to say probably around the time we got home from the hospital the baby blues came on. The lack of sleep, the pain from the c-section and pretty much having no clue what we were doing made it even worse I think. My hormones were just out of control. Almost the whole day I would be crying. Then crying even more because I was upset for being upset. It was a vicious cycle. My mom would text me to ask how I was doing, and just reading the text would send me over the edge and the crying would start again. I felt so much guilt for not being "happy". Even writing this I still feel some. Wondering if I could have prevented it in some way. Of course I KNOW it was out of my control. But I wanted that overwhelming happiness and love you hear about, for it to have instantly taken over me. I had still felt so cheated with my birth, and not having that moment of having him on my chest after he was born and getting that instant skin to skin time. I honestly 4 months later still feel sad about it. It makes me wonder if the situation was different and I did have the birth I dreamed of, if the baby blues wouldn't have happened. At the end of the day though, there is nothing I can change about it, and we made it out just fine. After a few days when Lincoln started sleeping better and I was able to get a little sleep here and there I started to feel much better. Its amazing how just a couple hours of sleep can help you. By 2 weeks the baby blues seemed to be gone, thank goodness. He started sleeping through the night (most nights) around a couple weeks old, I don't know how it happened but I'm not complaining! It would be so funny because he would find things and just focus on them, mostly the ceiling and shadows.

Nursing has been one of the hardest and greatest things. I really really struggled with it the first few weeks. Wondering if I was going to be able to push through. At around 2 weeks old I was ready to give up. I called a lady who rented hospital pumps and she wanted to know a little about my struggle with nursing. I told her what we were struggling with and she informed me, especially with it being so new still that by just exclusively pumping this soon could possibly dry my supply up and she recommended that I go see a lactation consultant, and if we couldn't get a handle on it to call her back and I could rent the pump. Breast feeding was something that was SO important to me. I knew it would be hard, but I never knew HOW hard. So I decided to take her advice and go see the LC and it did help a little, but more than anything it made my desire to stick it out and push through the pain come back. It wasn't until he was at least around 2 months old that it wasn't painful to nurse. It was a long road, but I'm so thankful we were able to figure it out!

11 days after Lincoln was born we celebrated his first Easter! We of course had it at my parents house and it was a lot of fun. Most of it was taking pictures of him.

Around 3 weeks old we started cloth diapering. I was afraid that with Louie just being back to work and with myself being alone with Lincoln that adding diaper laundry on top of everything would be somewhat overwhelming for me. Plus, the first two weeks Louie did 99% of the diaper changes. He was awesome. We had somewhat of a routine, especially since the first week getting up and down because of the c-section was SO hard that he was trying to make it as easy on me as possible that he just kind of took over that job. He never ONCE complained about changing a diaper. There were times he even lost sleep and got up with the baby and let me sleep because he knew how much I needed it. Ok enough bragging about my awesome husband ;)...but one day I decided to pull out one of his newborn sized cloth diapers just for fun. I LOVED IT. I was mad I waited so long to do it! It was SO easy, and he looked adorable in them lets be honest. :) From that day on we never looked back! It has been one of the best decisions we ever made.

Within the first month Lincoln was growing so much and learning new things what seemed like everyday! He was getting such a cute personality already. He makes the funniest facial expressions. Towards the end of his first month he was starting to make little coo noises and he also had his first photoshoot at exactly one month old. He did pretty good, but he wasn't a fan of the many outfit changes he had to do. He also developed thrush in his mouth around 3 weeks old. We tried SO many different medications and/or natural remedies to try to get rid of it.

May was a surreal month because it was my very first mothers day. Something I dreamed of for so many years, and I was actually able to celebrate it. We went with my parents to the Queen Mary. We thought it was very fitting to have it there. They had a special mothers day brunch, and we had an amazing afternoon. Lincoln slept through 90% of the time we were there!

At his 2 month checkup he had gone from 8.13lbs at birth to 12.13lbs. He also grew 2 inches.

His facial expressions were changing so much and he just makes the greatest faces. He was also ALMOST smiling. He LOVED (and still loves) going outside. Especially to see the horses. And bath time is still one of his favorite things. His first bath was a disaster, he cried the whole time, but ever since then he absolutely loves it.

He changed so much in his first 2 months of life, and it is so fun to watch. Sometimes I just stare at him in disbelief that he is actually mine. Louie and I catch ourselves just talking about the future, what he will be like, what his little voice will sound like, his first trip to Disneyland....its fun to think about. But I want to savor these times also and not have it pass to quickly!

BLT Salad

So I found this recipe on pinterest (Here is the original recipe) and I had to try it. BLT's are probably my favorite salad but I wasn't sure how the whole lime juice thing would go over as the dressing. AND IT WAS AMAZING. Probably one of the best salads ever...in my little old opinion at least. So I had to share!

Serves 2
Ingredients:
-Handful (you know I don't measure anything) of your favorite lettuce. I used a combo of iceburg, spinach and romaine. Chop it all up to your desired size.
-about 1/2 cup or so of corn
-1/2 tomato diced
-4 to 5 slices of cooked bacon, chopped
-4 oz feta cheese
-1 avocado diced
-1 1/2 tablespoons olive oil
-Juice of 1 lime
-pepper to taste

Cook your bacon, and combine everything in a bowl. And your done! SO easy and seriously delicious. The avocado and feta mixed with the oil and lime juice almost make it creamy.

My Labor and Delivery Story

So I realized I haven't even done a blog about becoming a mom. How do I even put it into words? I'm not sure. We waited 6 long years for this miracle and he is the biggest blessing we have ever received. 

Lincoln Anthony was born on March 20, 2013 at 8:59am after an emergency c-section, weighing 8lb13oz and 20.5" long. I guess I could start with my labor and delivery.

A c-section was my biggest fear when it came to labor. I dreamed of that moment of birthing my son and having him placed on my chest. Around 8:00pm on March 19 I started to have contractions. Louie frantically got the house ready, cleaning and doing last minute preparations. At the time I wasn't even sure I was REALLY in labor. Contractions started at about 30 seconds long and were every 4-5 minutes. Since the actual contraction was so short I thought they were just braxton hicks. They were hardly painful either. After a few hours of it continuing, I decided to take a shower and relax and see if that helped. So I took a shower, and laid on the couch while watching Bones on netflix. Contractions were getting closer and longer. I figured I would call the hospital to see if I should come in, they said to come in just to see so we got in the car and went. We probably got there around 2am. I was checked to see how dilated I was (which was more painful than ANY contraction I had let me tell you) and was about 5 cm. I couldn't believe it. I was having a BABY. After that my contractions started hyper stimming. So basically I was having one long contraction with no breaks. They gave me a shot to try to slow the contractions down which didn't help. Eventually I was moved into a room, and my parents showed up. I got the epidural and felt SO much better. But the combination (I think) of the drugs put Lincoln into distress. His heart rate started to drop, more than they would like to see. My Dr got to the hospital and checked me and I was about 7-8cm and she broke my water to try to help because we were really trying to avoid a c-section. Also should add, the combination of all these drugs REALLY put me into another world. I was SO out of it. Time meant nothing to me. 3 hours felt like 10 minutes to me. She broke my water and it didn't help and Lincoln's heart rate kept dropping. They tried to put fluid back inside, but that also didn't help. Finally, his heart rate got so bad, out of nowhere every nurse on the floor was in my room, prepping me for a c-section. I knew thats what needed to be done but I was terrified. I just remember looking and Louie with tears streaming down my face. I was wheeled off into the room, and I was SO out of it. As they were prepping me I remember almost falling asleep. I started to get really nauseous so they gave me the ridiculous lima bean to throw up in, but thankfully I never needed it. Louie finally got into the room, and it was time for them to start the c-section. I remember telling Louie "talk to me, just talk to me" and he was so scared he said "I...I dont know what to talk about". I started asking him about work, and lord knows what else, and they told me I was going to feel some pressure. They weren't kidding! It felt as if they set a car on top of my chest. It felt as if my ribs would break at any moment.  Then Lincoln was born. I heard him cry and just looked at Louie and said "oh my god, we have a baby, thats our baby"

I remember my Dr telling me that Lincoln did NOT want to come out, she said he was trying to squirm away from her. His cord was also wrapped around his neck AND he was holding it like suspenders. My kid, I swear. lol. 

I was wheeled back into the room, but all that is fuzzy. I wasn't breathing well. I was hardly breathing at ALL. They kept shaking me telling me to breathe. I just felt like I was going to fall asleep but I wanted to see him so badly. I knew he was in the room, I could hear him but I couldn't see him. I believe at this point the nurse was giving him a bath. She finally brought him to me and he started to nurse right away. I remember thinking "oh this doesn't hurt like I thought it would". This was all really fuzzy and I can't remember how long I was in there until I went to the post partum room. They gave me this little contraption that I had to breathe in and out of to get my lungs working better. 

Luckily we had a private room. But getting rest in a hospital is impossible. The walls are thin, nurses come in constantly, or they would forget to shut the door and the halls were loud. My nurse made me get up out of the bed that night I believe. SO painful! I thought my stomach would just rip right open. They told me moving and walking would make me feel better and heal faster. They were right, but it was still horrible. I was SO ready to get home though so I walked as much as I could. I told them thursday night I was ready to leave the next morning. They seemed surprised I wanted to leave so early, but I hated it there and I needed to get home. Friday morning came and we were so excited. The pediatrician came in and listened to his heart, and told me that she heard a heart murmur. My heart sank. I had heard of heart murmurs before, but was not knowledgeable about them at all. She told me they would need to do an echo cardiogram and they wheeled him away from me. I broke down. I was so worried for him. I got dressed and met him in there while it was being preformed. Apparently during it though his heart rate kept dropping when he would fall asleep, so we had to sit there with him a little longer as they monitored that. They told me that we would get the results that following Monday at his first dr appointment. 

I couldn't imagine waiting that long and I hoped I could try to put it out of my mind until then. 

We went back into our room after that, and finished packing and put Lincoln in his first outfit ever (which he wasn't very happy about lol), and we were on our way home! Finally!