Nostalgic.

So 5 years ago when I was a senior in high school my psychology teacher has us write letters to ourselves that he would send 5 years later.

I recently got mine, and it was kinda sad. One of my best friends, Heather, got hers also, and we read them out loud together. Her's was way funnier than mine, she went all out and put pictures, things she liked and whatnot in it. I just had a letter. But it really made me think of how much fun (despite some things) we had together. We were best friends with another girl, who right after high school her and I had a falling out, over something SO STUPID. Lets just say it was over a guy, in a way, and it was just dumb. Things were misconstrued, and taken way out of proportion and everything just blew up. But this girl was one of my BEST FRIENDS. In the letter I had talked about how I knew the three of us would be friends our whole lives blah blah blah. Its sad. We had alot of fun. But in some way, so much damage was done, I think on both our sides, and I don't know if it can be repaired. I hoped it would, sometime in these past 5 years, but it just didn't. Plus then eventually I moved away, she moved to another state, she ended up moving back, but has since moved back there again. I had saw through a friends facebook she has one as well, but I just wonder if theres even a point anymore. For me there is, I would like to rekindle things, if it was possible, I just don't know if its possible on her end. I guess in a way I'm too afraid to find out. I just emailed my best friend for her opinion to see what she thinks. So we'll see. Just kinda makes me miss the old days. :-/

Long Beach Day.

So this past Monday Louie and I decided to spend the day in Long Beach. We have year passes to the Aquarium of the Pacific, so we decided to stop their first. It wasn't TOO busy, which was nice. We hung out there for a few hours, and then decided to head across the bay to the Queen Mary, we hadn't been since last August for mine and my sister in laws birthday. It doesn't cost anything to go on the ship (unless you want to do the tours of course) so we got some yummy shakes (they are seriously the best ice cream shakes in the world, no joke) and walked around the ship a bit. We went by the chapel we were married in and noticed they totally updated it! New carpet, new art work, and alot of other stuff. Dangit! lol. It looked so nice. Oh well :) We spent about an hour or so there and headed home. It was a nice day. Here's some pictures:












Where our wedding reception was :)

Road trip?

Hubby and I have been wanting to take a road trip for awhile now, but with being laid off, we haven't really looked to much into taking one. But we were talking today, and we really would like to take one BEFORE we go back to work since we have the time! We just really need to budget as much as possible. Where we would love to go is to Bodie, CA. Its a ghost town in Northern California, I had gone back when I was in 5th grade, and I've always wanted to go back. Louie and I love "old west" and ghost town stuff, we enjoy going to Calico which is alot closer to us, and we've gone to Tombstone (which wasn't as awesome as I thought it was going to be lol). I looked on mapquest how long it would take us to drive to Bodie (6.5 hours) but the way it shows we would drive would be by the sequoia and Yosemite, and we've ALWAYS wanted to stop there as well. I'm really really hoping we can budget with this, and go up there. Even better I hope maybe I could talk my parents into going with us. My dad just retired in January and my mom doesn't work, so its the ONLY time we'll EVER have the time to go somewhere for the weekend or something. Hopefully I can talk them into it. If not, I really hope Louie and I can at least go. If any of you have budget tips for road trips PLEASE SHARE! =D

Disneyland & Hats

So yesterday my best friend Amanda and I went to Disneyland. We both have annual passes, so after she got off work she came and picked me up. We got there around 12:00ish and decided to head over to Disneys California Adventure first to go on Toy Story Mania. SUCH A FUN RIDE! But it totally makes your arm tired lol. It was WAY hotter than we thought it would be too, so we decided to go into Disneyland get some lunch and people watch. We did that for probably around 3 hours haha. We got lunch at the Riverbelle Terrace near pirates of the Caribbean, and just sat there and talked and people watched. We did happen to see two infants (probably barely even a year old) choke. The first time the parents and grandparents rushed to help the baby, and she was ok, but the second time the mom fed him something, he started choking and she LAUGHED. He was ok, but it was just appalling. After a few hours of hanging out there we decided to head over to some shops. For whatever reason, for as long as I can remember, everywhere we go, we try on hats and take pictures. So of course, we did alot of that. We left shortly after that, and came home and Louie and I took her to our little local Thai restaurant for dinner. We LOVE Thai food, and she had never had it before. She liked it! So that was fun. Here's some pictures.

Church, Peaches and testing.

I remember talking about a few blogs back how I really wanted Louie and I to start going to church on a more regular basis. As in every Sunday :), and the past couple week's we've been going to the little church my Grandma went to for practically her whole life. We really enjoy going there. The pastor and his wife were at the hospital the day I was born, almost 23 years ago, so its like another family. It just makes me sad because today, including us, there was only 10 people in church. And everyone who goes are alot older, as was my Grandma, and even though I love them, it would be nice to meet some other people our age. Today after service our pastors wife invited us back to their house for lunch. We talked...and talked, it was really nice. She also told me about a church a little closer to our house that their children go to. She even had brought up they totally understand and would love for us to meet other people closer to our age, I looked up the church tonight, and its beautiful, so I'm thinking we might start going there, and maybe once a month or so go to our little church to see everyone. We are also meeting up with Donna (pastors wife) again for lunch Thursday, so I'm going to talk more about it with her also. She brought up today if I wanted to get baptized, and I told her I was really thinking about it because I had never been, so I'm really looking forward to talking more with her and our pastor about it.

Tomorrow my best friend Amanda and I are going to Disneyland. She is picking me up after she gets off work tomorrow morning and we're heading out there, hopefully it's not too busy. I'm so glad we both have passes! I'm finally getting to the point where I'm not completely depressed and mopey. What happened with Peaches is still very much a wound on my heart, and I miss her so much, BUT, I think getting out of the house, especially going to church has helped. It was so nice also our pastor and the vets office sent us cards. It was so nice of them. I still haven't moved her dog bowl or any of her things. Her collar is still in the bag the vet sent us home with. It's weird because, there are things we were planning on doing with the dogs, for example, our little local park plays music once a week for the summer. So we were so excited to bring the dogs with us this year, and have a picnic dinner there and whatnot, and now its kinda bittersweet because Peaches isn't here. Yes, we can still take Chloe, and I'm sure we WILL, but I almost feel guilty. Like, I don't want let her do anything Peaches didn't get to do. I know it might sound silly, but I just have that feeling. I know in time that will probably (hopefully) fade as well.

I'm not sure if I mentioned it, but the test I took a few weeks back for the school district job, I passed! Which is great! BUT, I still have 2 more tests to pass until I would get an interview. So Tuesday is my second test. Instead of the paper saying to allow 2 hours to take the test, it says to allow only an hour, so that sounds like the test is a little smaller, I'm just nervous whats on the test because I have NO IDEA, just like I didn't for the last one. Hopefully I'll do ok though. Wish me luck!

My sweet Peaches.

April 28, only 6 days after we took my Peaches to the vet, she passed away. Only 6 days after we noticed her breathing. Ultimately, the fluid in her lungs from the cancer just made it too difficult for her to breathe. She got to the point where she couldn't even lay down to sleep. A few days after her first visit I noticed her breathing was getting a little worse. I called the vet to see if there was any way we would drain the fluid in her lungs or if there was any other treatment we could do. So Tuesday we went in, and he gave her a certain medicine that was supposed to help with the fluid, and it worked SO well! I was extremely optimistic. But, by 9:30ish that night, it got back to the point where she couldn't lay down to sleep again. I got so scared that I litterally got physically ill, as if I had the flu. It was horrible. I was so nervous and afraid. Wednesday morning we took her to the vet, and told him how she did so well, but by bedtime she couldn't lay down. So he decided to up the dosage a bit, try that, but if it didn't work to not wait until the next day but to call him that afternoon. Well, hours went by, and she didn't get any better. She still couldn't lay down. I knew it was time. Around 3:30 that afternoon I called, and they told me to come right in. I cannot explain how heart broken Louie and I are. Not only was it just horrible to watch her go through this, but to make the decision to not prolong it for her was heart wrenching. I couldn't stay in the room, but my husband just couldn't leave her alone. I knew she would have wanted me there, she was beyond attached to me, but I just couldn't watch them do that to her. My husband decided to stay so she wouldn't be alone, he said he held her paw the whole time, but in a way he almost regrets because he said the image is etched in his mind. We went there with Peaches, and left with her collar in a plastic bag. It seriously feels like someone has punched me in the stomach. Its so hard to be home. I see her EVERYWHERE here, I expect her to walk around the corner to find me. Walking by her dog bowl every morning. Seeing her bed next to ours in the bedroom. It KILLS me. We miss her to much. Last night Chloe came into the room for bedtime, and she walked over to Peaches bed and sniffed it, and just walked away, it was as if she was looking for Peaches. :( I know it will get easier in time, and I'm doing alot better today than I was a couple days ago, but its still miserable. A part of our family is gone, and it just doesn't feel right without her. Some people may not understand if they aren't huge animal lovers, but Peaches was like our child. We will miss her for the rest of our lives. :(

Bad bad day.

Yesterday we noticed our dog Peaches was breathing very deeply. She wasn't panting, but it was as if she was running around and breathing hard. She was also hacking/coughing as well. Peaches is about 11-12 years old so I was a little worried. When we noticed she was still breathing the same even as she was asleep, I knew I had to call the vet. When I described to them what was going on, they didn't even want an appt, and just told me to bring her right in. Well, after first listening to her heart, the vet heard alot of fluid and thought that her heart was leaking. He wanted to keep her for a few hours to take some xrays. Our vet knows about our situation being laid off, and he said he wouldn't cut corners with her but he would keep in mind our situation and call us before performing anything. Well, after taking xrays he found there was much much more fluid than he thought. And it was OUTSIDE the lungs, not inside. Which is pressing on the lungs making it difficult for her to breathe. He couldn't see the heart clearly so he recommended doing an ultrasound. The ultrasound tech only comes in once a week and thank you Lord he was there TODAY. He just wanted to call before doing it being the ultrasound was over $400 itself. But, it was the only way to find the problem, so I had to do it. Well, the heart was fine. And during the procedure they took a sample of the fluid, and it was blood tinged. Which is a very bad sign. So basically, there was a couple situations for that he said, one she got in contact (like eaten) something like rat poison. But I dont even own rat poison, and shes hardly EVER outside, other than to go potty and come right back in, so its not like she ate an animal that was poisoned. Or, its possible a tick bit her and fell off and she has some disease from it, which I'm PRAYING for because the only other option is it's cancer. And theres a tumor that is bleeding inside her. And if its anything but cancer, we can treat it. But, not cancer. And with her being 11-12 years old, I'm so afraid that it is cancer. My poor baby. I've only had her for 4 1/2 years. But she is my WORLD. Shes not just a pet to me, shes like my child. She was rescused from a puppy mill, and we got her when she was around 6 or 7. Since the first time the rescue brought her in our first little apartment Louie and I had, she INSTANTLY became attached to me. Instantly. She's my shadow. No matter where I go, she follows me. I can't imagine life without her. Luckily, the vet said she isn't in any pain. Thank God. She doesn't really even act like anythings wrong either! He couldn't believe how normal she seemed. Tomorrow we find out the results. I'm so scared. Please pray for us.